GuestCrib: The Fabulous Five by @saahrafunkie

Hi guys,
  Happy December!!!

This week on GuestCrib, we have yet a new writer who’s name is Adebimpe Adekunle. You can follow her on Twitter @saahrafunkie and read more of her works on the blog and do not forget to subscribe to her blog for instant updates. This entry is titled ‘The Fabulous Five’.
Happy reading. Don’t forget the comments🙋


Act one scene one

(One evening in an apartment of five female university students with four rooms. Clara sat down in front of her room and watched as Tianna, Hilda, Sahra and Mary argued over the real definition of being responsible.)

Mary: Tianna, don’t you dare use yourself as an example of being responsible because we both know you left this house to meet Mr. Williams in that hotel last weekend.

(Tiana looked at Mary with a sad face.)

Tianna: That was meant to be a secret between us.

(Hilda and Sahra looked at Tianna and laughed.)

Sahra: So, you do married men. Cant believe it. Tianna! A worker in church can go to an hotel to meet up with a married man.

(Sahra said as she laughed out loud.)

Hilda: No, girls, she went to preach to him about the word of God.

(They all laughed as Tianna left for her room in annoyance.)

Next scene
(The next morning, a beautiful Saturday morning with a serene weather, Clara and Sahra sat outside the house after doing their chores to play scrabble.)

Sahra: Clara, why didn’t you say anything yesterday when we were talking about being responsible?

Clara: No reason. There was nothing to say.

Sahra: Or you were thinking our reasoning is low to yours like you always say?

Clara: Haba! I loved the topic of your discussion yesterday but I’m not used to shouting and arguing to pass a message.

Sahra: Okay ooo, if you say so.

(Mary and Hilda entered and stood behind Clara to watch the game.)

Clara: You girls were talking about being responsible, it was very irresponsible of you all to laugh at Tianna yesterday.

(Hilda tapped Clara’s head.)

Hilda: You this ajebo girl, for your life no ever say my own action no dey responsible.

Clara: You shouldn’t have hit my head though. I’m sorry for saying that to you.

(Clara left the sitting room and went to her room.)

Hilda: Wetin dey do that girl self? Is she the only one with rich parents wey she dey form better pikin for us.

Mary: I’m sure she will be involved in aristos like Tianna because what she has is more than what a parent can afford.

Hilda: You are right, Mary.

Sahra: You girls should leave her abeg. Because she doesn’t see things the way we do doesn’t mean she should be bullied.

(Hilda stood up mimicking Clara.)

Hilda: It was so irresponsible of you to laugh at her.

(She said with a lame tone. They all laughed and left for their rooms.)

Next scene
(On a Monday morning when all students ought to be in school, Mary is at home with Mr. Willams while Hilda, Sahra and Clara have gone to school leaving only Mary at home because she lied of stomach aches. An hour after they left, Tianna Came back home and entered Mary’s room to check on her but she found Mr. Willliams in bed wit Mary.)

Tianna: What! Mary, how could you? Is this the medicine that will cure your stomach ache?
(Mary stared at her in surprise.)

Mary: Yes, girlfriend. This is the perfect medicine.

(Mary said pointing to Mr. Williams.)

Mary: What are you doing at home by this time?

Tianna: Came to do the same thing you are doing in bed with my man.

(Tianna said angrily.)

(Mary hugged Mr. Williams closer.)

Mary: Now my man.

Tianna: Ngbo? Mr Williams, what is happening?

Mr. Williams: Both of you are my little angels, why don’t you come in Tianna and let us all have fun together.

Tianna: Never! Over my dead body!

Mr. Williams: Okay then, will let Mary get all the cookies and money alone.

(Mary smiled. Tianna was about to close the door when she heard what Mr. Williams said. She turned back with a teasing look.)

Tianna: Did you just say the cookies and the money? Why I dey vex self, na me be your wife?

(Tianna jumped in bed with Mr. Williams and Mary. She placed a kiss on his lips.)

Tianna: If not for me, you won’t know Mary so I will collect the highest amount.

Mary: Uhnn. Uhnn. You dey craze, una no go pay for room?

(Few minutes later, Clara walked in and met Tianna and Mary walking Mr. Williams to his car.)

Next scene

(On a beautiful evening, Hilda and Tianna sat down outside talking about school when Hilda received a message from her fiancee.)

Hilda: This guy is so useless, who the hell does he think he is.

Tianna: Who is that?

Hilda: This yeye guy I called fiancee ni o. He said he saw a naked picture on his friend’s phone and his friend said it’s mine.

Tianna: Who is his friend?

Hilda: Is it not that mad guy that introduced me to him.

Tianna: You mean Paul?

Hilda: Yes.

Tianna: How come Paul has your naked picture?

Hilda: He called me yesterday that he was horny and needed to masturbate so I sent it.

Tianna: Hilda! You are so irresponsible. Your fiancee’s friend!

Hilda: Abeg!!!!! Don’t go good girl on me. Still better than you who sleep around with a married man.

(Clara and Sahra walked in. Sahra looked at both of them with a disgusting look.)

Sahra: Both of you are doomed.

(She laughed at them.)

Sahra: Yeye girls. Ashawo.

(She laughed and left both of them shouting at each other. Saying I’m better than you.)

Next scene

(On a Sunday afternoon after church. The fabulous five were in Clara’s room watching a movie. The movie ended and they were giving their opinions about the movie when Mr. Williams knocked on the door.)

Mr Williams: Good afternoon, please I’m looking for Tianna.

(Sahra opened the door and was shocked when she saw the man outside.)

Sahra: Dad, what are you doing here?

(Mr. Williams stammered.)

Mr Williams: I’mmmmmmm….. Here to see a colleague’s daughter.

(Tianna moved closer, saw Mr. Williams and hugged him with a kiss.)

(Sahra dragged her back.)

Sahra: Is this the Mr. Williams you do talk about?

Tianna: Yes! You wanna have a taste too? Mary had a taste of him last week monday.

Sahra: Dad, how could you? How could you sleep with a girl of your daughter’s age?

(Tianna was shocked to hear her call Mr. Williams ‘dad’.)

Tianna: Da…da… dad?

(Tianna stammered while she pointed at Mr. Williams.)

(The other three came out to see what was going on.)

Mary: Mr. Williams. It’s really nice of you to come.

(Mary placed a kiss on his lips too. Tianna dragged her away from him.)

Mary: What is it?

Tianna: He is Sahra’s dad.

Mary: What!

Mr. Williams: I’m not sorry for my action, all you do is steal my money and your mother is never there to satisfy my sexual urge.

Sahra: She cant! Because she contacted HIV from you.

(Mary, Hilda, Tianna and Clara all exclaimed HIV! And Mr. Williams left there with a disgraceful look. Hilda received a message from her fiancee.)

Hilda: My fiancee just called off the wedding proposal.

Mary: I’m doomed. HIV!

Sahra: I have to steal because I need to meet up with my social life.

Tianna: If I had known he had HIV, i would have been careful.

Clara: Now which one of you suites the definition of being responsible?

(They all stared at one another.)

2 thoughts on “GuestCrib: The Fabulous Five by @saahrafunkie

  1. Wow…this is serious! They’re all birds of same feather, including the one that steals to meet up with a fake life she called #Social…


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